Ever been struck by a revelation so profound it felt like the universe hit the ‘illuminate’ switch in your mind? The bright flicker of an idea, that sudden spark of realization, the instant where knowledge becomes deep understanding — these are the transformative lightbulb moments we all cherish.
This year you’ve probably experienced these rare realizations through great successes and hard-fought battles and as the year draws to a close, it’s crucial to look at these troubles and triumphs in hindsight and carve out the wisdom you’ve obtained.
Let’s dive into 2023’s most electrifying epiphanies that shattered norms, reshaped perspectives, and illuminated paths you (and I) never knew existed.
Lightbulb 1: Failing forward
Failure → Fortitude
Mistakes → Motivation
Rejection → Redirection
I’ve always known this, but this year I finally understood it. Failing or making a mistake is nothing but a precious lesson in disguise.
We’re taught from an early age to aim high in life, but we are not taught what to do, when our expectations don’t meet reality. As a result, many people struggle with [lack of] achievement and begin to feel like a failure.
But here’s the truth of the matter: Failing doesn’t make you a failure. Making a mistake doesn’t make you a mistake. When you identify with your faults, you start to become them. You don’t think: “That wasn’t very smart of me,” you think: “I am not smart.” See the difference? This mentality is extremely damaging to your self-esteem.
All it takes to overcome is a simple, yet transformative mindset change. Failing in your relationship, at your job, in your family etc. is a natural part of life. Failing isn’t dangerous — it’s helpful, because it forges a stronger, more resilient self.
Borrowed from our inspirational Instagram page, you’ll find 6 reasons why making mistakes can be a real blessing in life here:
Lightbulb 2: The superpower of solitude
This post was inspired by another recent lightbulb moment: How to be alone without being lonely…
Solitude, often confused with loneliness, is about embracing your own company and finding comfort in your own mind. It’s about realizing that there’s a world of wisdom and self-discovery within and in doing so, you’re building a fulfilling, sustainable relationship with yourself — truly transformative!
The idea of this was life-changing for me, because it emphasizes the quality time you spend with yourself every day. In a world that never sleeps, our down-time is often occupied by chores, responsibilities, relationships, and entertainment, so we forget to prioritize the well-being of our lives’ main character: Yourself.
We must normalize filling up our own cup before giving to others, because the best gift you can give to the world is a happy and fulfilled you. In solitude, you give yourself what you truly need whether it’s meditation, nature walks, exercise, a trip to the movies, or a weeping session in the closet etc. This is the highest form of self-love!
When putting yourself in the driver’s seat, you’ll find yourself able to navigate the roads of life better than before. Where you would have lost your temper, gotten anxious, or lost clarity before, you now gain the ability to act in alignment with your best self — simply because you have more to give.
Lightbulb 3: The discovery of breathwork
Breathwork was a transformative for me this year. I wish I had started the practice sooner, and I cannot foresee a future without it as a key part of my daily routine.
Every breath we take is a gift, yet rarely do we acknowledge its power. Breath is life, and by practicing your breath, you are literally practicing life at its core.
Some of the science-backed benefits of breathwork include:
Stress reduction
Increased energy level
Improved mental focus
Emotional regulation
Better sleep quality
Pain management
Anxiety and depression relief
Mind-body connection
Breathwork temporarily guides you into a higher state of awareness. Many find themselves in an almost trance-like zone where the stress and anxiety don’t interfere. It’s like a cleansing of the mind, effectively releasing any mental or emotional strains weighing you down.
If breathwork is new to you, start by following a guided breathwork session like the one you see below. (Click HERE if interested in other transformative 5-minute practices that you can add to your daily routine).
Lightbulb 4: Comparison is the thief of joy
We’ve all been there… Feeling slightly dwarfed by someone else’s accomplishments. This starts a relentless cycle where even our most significant achievements seem miniscule compared to others’ greater accomplishments — more respect, higher status, bigger salary, more likes etc. Comparison is truly the thief of all joy.
This year taught me that we’re all on a unique path with distinct challenges, triumphs, and milestones. We’re not all competing in the same race; instead, we’re travelling diverse paths towards our own destinations. Drawing parallels only blurs our vision, blinding us to the beauty of our own growth.
This way of thinking makes you deeply unsatisfied. Success is wonderful; success at the cost of satisfaction is not. Besides, success is relative, and what living a successful life means to me, will mean something else to another. Life is about seeking your success and not others’ — and that’s good enough!
Non-competitive living is so transformative because of the burden taken off your shoulders. It allows you to celebrate your victories to the fullest whatever they may look like. The bottom line is: Don’t disregard your brilliance based on another person’s achievements.
“Don’t compare your life to others’. There’s no comparison between the sun and the moon. They shine when it’s their time.”
Chinese proverb
Lightbulb 5: Doing absolutely nothing
In the pursuit of good grades, loving relationships, fulfilling careers, and kick-ass lives, it’s easy to overlook the power of stillness. Our minds are racing from one item on the daily to-do list to the next, and we forget to be truly present in all of this.
One fine day, this lightbulb found me when I had just finished my daily meditation and I thought: When is the last time I just sat and did nothing? Seriously nothing; no screens, no meditating, no intention, not seeking a specific outcome — just pure being? As I sat there, I let go of all expectations, and that’s exactly when it arrived… I found myself in a state of deep bliss and clarity.
Remove all gadgets, distractions, and expectations for a few minutes and just be. It’s in this stillness that you can hear the whispers of your heart.
Although it can feel uncomfortable at first, a 10-minute vacation of doing absolutely nothing away from the noise and obligations is necessary for your mind and body to operate effectively during your day, motivated and with a smile on your face.
“Between us and the stars, there lies but silence: and there in the stillness let us listen to the voice that is speaking within us.“
Jerome K. Jerome
Lightbulb 6: The travelling trap
This one goes out to all my fellow globetrotters who have also come to this conclusion: Geographic destinations, no matter how stunning, cannot be the only determinants of your happiness. While the initial awe and wonder might bring fleeting joy, true happiness is not found in external surroundings.
Rather than seeking outwards, look inwards where purpose resides. Your internal world shapes your external world. This means that you can be deeply miserable and lonely at Kauai’s most beautiful beach, or you can be fulfilled and grateful on your coffee stained living room couch — all depending on your inside.
Wherever you go there you are, bringing all your problems, worries, and fears with you as loyal travel companions. So, the next time you feel like buying a dream vacation (like I did), give your mind the break it needs before buying the tickets.
Make peace with the present, ground yourself, and remember: What you see is where you need to be.
Farewell Reflections
These were my most transformative lightbulb moments of 2023, and I hope you learned a thing or two from them, but more importantly — what’s yours?
To help you answer this question as thoroughly as possible, we’ve created a FREE worksheet that you can go through with your partner, a dear friend, or in the solitude of your own company.
Download it here:
As always, don’t forget to share these transformative lessons with the people in your life who need to hear them.
Thank you for your time!
— Guides for Growth